Suppose that every day, ten men go out for beer and the bill for
all ten comes to $100. If they paid their bill the way we pay our taxes, it
would go something like this:
The first four men (the poorest) would pay nothing.
The fifth would pay $1.
The sixth would pay $3.
The seventh would pay $7.
The eighth would pay $12.
The ninth would pay $18.
The tenth man (the richest) would pay $59.
So, that's what they decided to do. The ten men drank in the bar every day and
seemed quite happy with the arrangement, until one day, the owner threw them a
curve. 'Since you are all such good customers,' he said, 'I'm going to reduce
the cost of your daily beer by $20.' Drinks for the ten now cost just $80.
The group still wanted to pay their bill the way we pay our
taxes so the first four men were unaffected. They would still drink for free.
But what about the other six men - the paying customers? How could they divide
the $20 windfall so that everyone would get his 'fair share?' They realized that
$20 divided by six is $3.33. But if they subtracted that from everybody's share,
then the fifth man and the sixth man would each end up being paid to drink his
beer. So, the bar owner suggested that it would be fair to reduce each man's
bill by roughly the same amount, and he proceeded to work out the amounts each
The fifth man, like the first four, now paid nothing (100% savings).
The sixth now paid $2 instead of $3 (33%savings).
The seventh now pay $5 instead of $7 (28%savings).
The eighth now paid $9 instead of $12 (25% savings).
The ninth now paid $14 instead of $18 (22% savings).
The tenth now paid $49 instead of $59 (16% savings).
Each of the six was better off than before. And the first four continued to
drink for free. But once outside the restaurant, the men began to compare their
'I only got a dollar out of the $20,'declared the sixth man. He
pointed to the tenth man,' but he got $10!'
'Yeah, that's right,' exclaimed the fifth man. 'I only saved a
dollar, too. It's unfair that he got ten times more than I got'
'That's true!!' shouted the seventh man. 'Why should he get $10
back when I got only two? The wealthy get all the breaks!'
'Wait a minute,' yelled the first four men in unison. 'We didn't
get anything at all. The system exploits the poor!'
The nine men surrounded the tenth and beat him up. The next
night the tenth man didn't show up for drinks so the nine sat down and had beers
without him. But when it came time to pay the bill, they discovered something
important. They didn't have enough money between all of them for even half of
the bill! And that, ladies and gentlemen, journalists, and college professors,
is how our tax system works. The people who pay the highest taxes get the most
benefit from a tax reduction. Tax them too much, attack them for being wealthy,
and they just may not show up anymore. In fact, they might start drinking
overseas where the atmosphere is somewhat friendlier.
For those who understand, no explanation is needed.
For those who do not understand, no explanation is possible.
We the sensible people of the United States, in an attempt to
help everyone get along, restore some semblance of justice, avoid more riots,
keep our nation safe, promote positive behavior, and secure the blessings of
debt free liberty to ourselves and our great-great-great-grandchildren, hereby
try one more time to ordain and establish some common sense guidelines for the
terminally whiny, guilt ridden, delusional, and other liberal bed-wetters. We
hold these truths to be self evident: that a whole lot of people are confused by
the Bill of Rights and are so dim they require a Bill of NON-Rights."
ARTICLE I: You do not have the right to a new car, big screen TV, or any other
form of wealth. More power to you if you can legally acquire them, but no one is
ARTICLE II: You do not have the right to never be offended. This country is
based on freedom, and that means freedom for everyone -- not just you! You may
leave the room, turn the channel, express a different opinion, etc.; but the
world is full of idiots, and probably always will be.
ARTICLE III: You do not have the right to be free from harm. If you stick a
screwdriver in your eye, learn to be more careful, do not expect the tool
manufacturer to make you and all your relatives independently wealthy.
ARTICLE IV: You do not have the right to free food and housing. Americans are
the most charitable people to be found and will gladly help anyone in need, but
we are quickly growing weary of subsidizing generation after generation of
professional couch potatoes who achieve nothing more than the creation of
another generation of professional couch potatoes
ARTICLE V: You do not have the right to free health care. That would be nice,
but from the looks of public housing, we're just not interested in public health
ARTICLE VI: You do not have the right to physically harm other people. If you
kidnap, rape, intentionally maim, or kill someone, don't be surprised if the
rest of us want to see you fry in the electric chair.
ARTICLE VII: You do not have the right to the possessions of others. If you rob,
cheat, or coerce away the goods or services of other citizens, don't be
surprised if the rest of us get together and lock you away in a place where you
still won't have the right to a big screen color TV or a life of leisure.
ARTICLE VIII: You do not have the right to a job. All of us sure want you to
have a job, and will gladly help you along in hard times, but we expect you to
take advantage of the opportunities of education and vocational training laid
before you to make yourself useful.
ARTICLE IX: You do not have the right to happiness. Being an American means that
you have the right to PURSUE happiness, which, by the way, is a lot easier if
you are unencumbered by an over abundance of idiotic laws created by those of
you who were confused by the Bill of Rights.
ARTICLE X: This is an English speaking country. We don't care where you are
from, English is our language. Learn it or go back to wherever you came from!
ARTICLE XI: You do not have the right to change our country's history or
heritage. This country was founded on the belief in one true God. And yet, you
are given the freedom to believe in any religion, any faith, or no faith at all;
with no fear of persecution. The phrase IN GOD WE TRUST is part of our heritage
and history and if you are uncomfortable with it, TOUGH!!!!
Sensible people of the United States: speak out
because if you don't, insensible people will.
Joe Smith started the day early having set his alarm clock (MADE IN JAPAN) for 6am. While his coffeepot (MADE IN CHINA) was perking, he shaved with his electric razor (MADE IN HONG KONG). He put on a dress shirt (MADE IN SRI LANKA), designer jeans (MADE IN SINGAPORE) and tennis shoes (MADE IN KOREA). After cooking his breakfast in his new electric skillet (MADE IN INDIA) he sat down with his calculator (MADE IN MEXICO) to see how much he could spend today. After setting his watch (MADE IN TAIWAN) to the radio (MADE IN INDIA) he got in his car (MADE IN GERMANY) and continued his search for a good paying AMERICAN JOB. At the end of yet another discouraging and fruitless day, Joe decided to relax for a while. He put on his sandals (MADE IN BRAZIL) poured himself a glass of wine (MADE IN FRANCE) and turned on his TV (MADE IN INDONESIA), and then wondered why he can't find a good paying job
Did you know . . .
Number of physicians in the US: 700,000
Accidental deaths caused by physicians per year: 120,000
Accidental deaths per physician: 0.171
Number of gun owners in the US: 80,000,000
Number of accidental gun deaths per year (all age groups): 1,500
Accidental deaths per gun owner: 0.0000188
Statistically, doctors are approximately 9,000 times more
dangerous than gun owners.
FACT: Not everyone has a gun, but everyone has at least one doctor.
Please alert your friends to this alarming threat. We must ban doctors
before this gets out of hand.
is the VETERAN, not the preacher,
who has given us freedom of religion.
It is the VETERAN, not the reporter,
who has given us freedom of the press.
It is the VETERAN, not the poet,
who has given us freedom of speech.
It is the VETERAN, not the campus organizer,
who has given us freedom to assemble.
It is the VETERAN, not the lawyer,
who has given us the right to a fair trial.
It is the VETERAN, not the politician,
Who has given us the right to vote.
FIREARMS REFRESHER COURSE
a. An armed man is a citizen. An unarmed man is a subject.
b. A gun in the hand is better than a cop on the phone.
c. Glock: The original point and click interface.
d. Gun control is not about guns; it's about control.
e. If guns are outlawed, can we use swords?
f. If guns cause crime, then pencils cause misspelled words.
g. Free men do not ask permission to bear arms.
h. If you don't know your rights you don't have any.
I. Those who trade liberty for security have neither.
j. The United States Constitution (c) 1791. All Rights reserved.
k. What part of "shall not be infringed" do you not understand?
l. The Second Amendment is in place in case they ignore the others.
m. 79,999,987 firearms owners killed no one yesterday.
n. Guns only have two enemies: rust and liberals.
o. Know guns, know peace and safety. No guns, no peace nor safety.
p. You don't shoot to kill; you shoot to stay alive.
q. 911 - government sponsored Dial-a-Prayer.
r. Assault is a behavior, not a device.
s. Criminals love gun control - it makes their jobs safer.
t. If guns cause crime, then matches cause arson.
u. Only a government that is afraid of its citizens tries to control them.
v. You only have the rights you are willing to fight for.
w. Enforce the "gun control laws" we have, don't make more.
x. When you remove the people's right to bear arms, you create slaves.
y. The American Revolution would never have happened with gun control.
z. "...a government of the people, by the people, for the people..."
"Laws that forbid the carrying of arms.
. . disarm only those who are neither inclined nor determined to commit
crimes. . . Such laws make things worse for the assaulted and better for the
assailants; they serve rather to encourage than to prevent homicides, for an
unarmed man may be attacked with greater confidence than an armed man." - Thomas Jefferson - Third United
IMMIGRANTS, NOT AMERICANS, MUST ADAPT
I am tired of this nation worrying about whether we are offending some individual or their culture. Since the terrorist attacks on Sept. 11, we have experienced a surge in patriotism by the majority of Americans. However, the dust from the attacks had barely settled when the "politically correct" crowd began complaining about the possibility that our patriotism was offending others.
I am not against immigration, nor do I hold a grudge against anyone who is seeking a better life by coming to America. Our population is almost entirely made up of descendants of immigrants. However, there are a few things that those who have recently come to our country, and apparently some born here, need to understand. This idea of America being a multicultural community has served only to dilute our sovereignty and our national identity. As Americans, we have our own culture, our own society, our own language and our own lifestyle. This culture has been developed over centuries of struggles, trials, and victories by millions of men and women who have sought freedom.
We speak ENGLISH, not Spanish, Portuguese, Arabic, Chinese, Japanese, Russian, or any other language. Therefore, if you wish to become part of our society, learn the language!
"In God We Trust" is our national motto. This is not some Christian, right wing, political slogan. We adopted this motto because Christian men and women, on Christian principles, founded this nation, and this is clearly documented. It is certainly appropriate to display it on the walls of our schools. If God offends you, then I suggest you consider another part of the world as your new home, because God is part of our culture.
If Stars and Stripes offend you, or you don't like Uncle Sam, then you should seriously consider a move to another part of this planet. We are happy with our culture and have no desire to change, and we really don't care how you did things where you came from. This is OUR COUNTRY, our land, and our lifestyle. Our First Amendment gives every! citizen the right to express his opinion and we will allow you every opportunity to do so. But once you are done complaining, whining, and griping about our flag, our pledge, our national motto, or our way of life, I highly encourage you take advantage of one other great American freedom, THE RIGHT TO LEAVE.
the War, Stupid
presents commentary by
a country smack in the middle of World War III we certainly are a blas bunch. We're worried about how much fighting the people who want to kill us
will cost and whether we have an "exit strategy" in
Craven politicians and crazed columnists are second guessing President Bush,
who, at times, looks like he's first guessing the nation's foreign policy.
Since Mr. Bush, for some inexplicable reason, will not spell it out for you,
it falls on me to do so.
There are around the world thousands of Islamic fanatics who want to kill
Americans because they believe Allah is down with that. These people are
taught from the time they are children that Jews and Americans are undeserving
of life on this planet. There is no negotiation with the most of these
zealots; there is nothing one can say to dissuade them. They want blood, and
they will use any and all means to get it.
A number of nations help these killers and allow the murderous anti-American
indoctrination to continue generation after generation.
Arabia are the most threatening to us, although the Saudis do have some pro-American
government officials like Prince Bandar, its ambassador to the United
used to be a terrorist enabler primarily by helping the homicide bombers kill
civilians in Israel,
but Saddam Hussein was open to causing trouble for the
however he could.
The Islamic killers thrive on the Palestinian situation. As long as the
Palestinians are denied a state of their own, the propaganda machine that
will roll along unchallenged in the Arab world. So the only way to break down
the hatred many Arabs have toward us is to forge a Palestinian-Israeli peace
agreement that both sides can live with.
In order for
to cooperate in this effort fully, it needs to feel secure. Having the
helps that effort. Also, the
needs a democratic outpost in the
to put pressure on the terrorist states of
A foothold in that region makes it infinitely more difficult for Al Qaeda to
carry out its evil doing. Just the huge CIA presence in Iraq
alone gives the USA
a major advantage in learning about terrorist operations before they hurt we
This nonsense about the United Nations rescuing America
is something Aesop would have published. The U.N. is a chaotic chamber with no
sense of urgency about terrorism and no sympathy toward the USA.
Now some of that antipathy might be justified, but not when American lives are
at stake. In a perfect world, all countries that aid and abet terrorism would
be isolated and embargoed. But this is far from a perfect world.
The failure of France,
to aggressively help America
neutralize terror states is an outrage of historic proportions.
is the worst. The Chirac government lied to Secretary of State Colin Powell
about enforcing the U.N. resolution demanding Saddam cooperate with the
weapons inspectors. Then
actively undermined both the war and the occupation. President Bush should
level with the American people about the duplicity of
and, to a lesser extent, Germany.
I know this would cause an uproar, but what the French have done to hurt
At the same time, the Bush administration must begin earnestly persuading
nations that are not overtly hostile to us that we don't want to dominate the
world, we want to make it safe for everyone.
Finally, World War III is unlike any war in history, and mistakes will be made
in the fighting of it. The Bush administration has the correct global view
regarding terrorism but poor communications skills both within the country and
abroad. The sad truth is that most people don't even know that World War III
is underway and have little understanding of the strategies and stakes. But
believe me, you and your family are in danger. We must stop the partisan
bickering and acknowledge that brain-washed fanatics have us in their sights.
And this time there's no Geneva Convention and no limits on deadly weaponry.
This time there is no "exit strategy." It's us or them.
YES, I'M A BAD AMERICAN
I Am Your Worst Nightmare. I am a BAD American.
I believe the money I make belongs to me and my family, not some mid level governmental functionary be it Democratic or Republican!
I'm in touch with my feelings and I like it that way, damn it!
I think owning a gun doesn't make you a killer, it makes you a smart American.
I think being a minority does not make you noble or victimized, and does not entitle you to anything.
I believe that if you are selling me a Big Mac, try to do it in English.
I think fireworks should be legal on the 4th of July.
I think that being a student doesn't give you any more enlightenment than working at Blockbuster. In fact, if your parents are footing the bill to put your pansy ass through 4 years plus, of college, you haven't begun to be enlightened.
I believe everyone has a right to pray to his or her God when and where they want to.
My heroes are John Wayne, Babe Ruth, Roy Rogers, and whoever canceled Jerry Springer.
I don't hate the rich. I don't pity the poor.
I know wrestling is fake and I don't waste my time arguing about it.
I think global warming is a big lie. Where are all those experts now, when I'm freezing my ass off during these long winters and paying, paying, paying?
I've never owned a slave, or was a slave, I didn't wander forty years In the desert after getting chased out of Egypt. I haven't burned any witches or been persecuted by the Turks and neither have you! So, shut-the-Hell-up already.
I want to know which church is it exactly where the Reverend Jesse Jackson practices, where he gets his money, and why he is always part of the problem and not the solution. Can I get an AMEN on that one?
I think the cops have every right to shoot your sorry ass if you're running from them.
I also think they have the right to pull your ass over if you're breaking the law, regardless of what color you are.
I think if you are too stupid to know how a ballot works, I don't want you deciding who should be running the most powerful nation in the world for the next four years.
I dislike those people standing in the intersections trying to sell me crap or trying to guilt me into making "donations" to their cause. These people should be targets.
I believe that it doesn't take a village to raise a child, it takes two parents.
I believe if she has her lips on your Willie, it's sex, and this applies even if you are President of the United States.
And what the hell is going on with gas prices... again?
If this makes me a BAD American, then yes, I'm a BAD American.
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